Tuesday, March 10, 2009

oNLy fOr ThE giRLs


oh puhlease. don't be such a putz.

anyways. on another note. i wonder how strong your constitution is... i mean can i write of topics that are usually not spoken of in polite circles?? topics that, traditionally, all guys pretend don't exist and are polite enough to cough and look the other way when, even vaguely referred to in their presence.
i get it. get that some things make you uncomfortable. but puhLEASE.
it's a big part of my life.
i shouldn't have to dance around the fact that once every month, i leak like a porous bucket with a stupid hole in it or you don't have to start looking up at the sky and whistling the pied pipers tune if i even by mistake bring it up ....

you know culturally we have so many topics that are taboo. i never understood that. most times i'd embarrass people around me by talking of things they didn't want to hear. i mean stuff like my feelings, my dad, emotions, your fears, etc etc
:P [ but those are topics for another day. mebe tomoro ]

but this?
i mean come ON. it's a big part of my life. so i got no problem talking about it.
ok so i'm all that comfortable talking about sex or nude ppl. but that's only coz i don't want to talk about it with YOU. jeez man, i hardly know you. it's like sharing your toothbrush. [ eeeeeewwww ]


so anyways.

you know. you have to hand it to women. [ if this topic is beyond your scope, here... take 10 bucks and go to the corner shop for a sweetmint and let the adults talk for a bit ] i mean anyone who can do this month after month. sigh. i hate it you know.. especially since i seem to have a pathological problem wherein once it starts, it takes forever to stop. [ hey. my annual average was 45 days a couple of years ago... ] and i tell you... its a pain. oh you imagine a constant leak from your orifice and consider it's propensity to ruin your clothes. and then consider also that literally, your life force is bleeding out of you....
luckily though i don't follow the lunar calendar. till last year i seemed to follow some moon of pluto calendar where i'd be under the influence only twice a year.
it still wasn't a piece of cake. twice a year. for about 45 days i'd be a snarling irritated walking oestrogen hormone.


and now. sigh.

this year. something changed. now i have it every month. unfortunately it lasts for 15 days. so that's half a month gone. make that 150 days a year.

aaaw hell. this is just wat i needed...

i can't decide what's worse. the before or the after... and then there is the suspense movie each time. will it stop? won't it?? will i just bloomin bleed to death this time around??? meds?? hormone pills. aaaw crud they just give me an early glimpse into menopause. i really hate those pills.

guys? they don't really get it. worse, are those particular well meaning, helpful good samaritans.
"oh your tired? why don't you go exercise a bit." [ and while i'm at it why don't i smash your face in? ] i can't get over the number of ppl who ask me to work out when i'm feeling exhausted, cranky and downright irritable. [ i once had an HB level around 7 when i was asked to join the gym. needless to say i was too tired to move my leg and kick the person. instead i did the only thing i could, fall on my face and go to sleep ]

oh puhlease don't ask me to see a doctor. the last time i saw a doctor was in 2002, after a gazillion tests, he finally diagnosed that i was pathologically hormonal [ you think? ] and the only way to stabilize it was to get pregnant. [ you bet i wanted to pull his tongue out of his throat, wrap it around his neck and strangle him with it - J D Robb ]


  1. Would be lookin out for comments from your female readers.

  2. actually nowadays its only you, me and bub.

  3. wheya d ol anuns?

  4. is this some kind of secret code?