Friday, May 15, 2009

tAkiNG a sHoT

man we were soooo tired from carting all those planks around... when we got home, she calls P to come help us carry the plank home from the car, and he's like
"i'm watching a movie, can't we do that later ??"


guys are such pigs!!
anyways we blackmailed.... ok she blackmailed him to come help us, and he did. bout 10 min later and we got all the stuff up....hufff huffff....

[ ok a lil background here.... me and A went to Ikea to get her a bed frame.. and it was friggin heavy!! man. and i scratched myself , but ok we digress.... ]

so the thing is kind of complicated to assemble and since we're like totally busy the whole weekend, [ A's bf who is P has a cricket match, we need to shop for a camping trip..etc etc v.v.imp man ] she asked if we could do it today, but he was like
"today is MY day, i'm not doing anything. very tired.... so i can't help you"

< ghastly deathly silence >

O-M-G!! ok so all of this was going on in the gobbldygook language, and guess my T is getting better coz i understood all of that... but now she suddenly goes all quite and i'm like uh-oh. you are like SO screwed dude! what were you THINKING!! whatever you just told her, it was SOOO the wrong thing to say...


anyhooo, A stops in the middle of borrowing the drill bit and hammer from a friend and says never mind, we'll do it later. and goes all scary silent kinds...and i'm just sitting there... right there!!! [ ok come on, pretend u understood nothing and whistle. ok damn it, i can't whistle for nuts and don't make eye contact with anyone. A looks like she's gonna burst into tears any sec. P looks like he'd like to hit someone... for God's sake don't make eye contact. and KEEP whistling. uh-oh may day may day, we have eye contact, start talking... i dunno wat! just something...anything!!. make sure A does NOT cry.
distraction... we need A distraction.
ok stumble over the wooden plank and fall on ur face.. that's a good distraction. ur not forced to console anyone if ur bleeding and unconscious on the floor are you?? ... [[ as you might have guessed i'll do anything to avoid confronting a weepy woman. ]]
well then i did the next best thing. went into my room to pretend i'm doing something important and ignore the rising tension. [ man, i tell u. its all a bunch of roses till someone decides they'd rather go ride they're bike than help us assemble house furniture :P ]
ok ok anyways.. so then we have dinner and there is this death chill in the room. and me sitting there desperate to diffuse the tension. and i start talking about kites. [ wtf!! KITES?? why the heck are we talking about KITES?? ] and some other random stuff. and then P tells how he had gone for a bike ride at 3, got stuck in traffic and finally reached home at 7.... which i am forced to admit is pretty tiring. and i'm making all the proper sympathetic noises.. and...

[ what am i?? the comic relief here??? where is my 2 million contract and corner RV?? ]

yes. YES it was a tiring day for ME too!! how did you guess?? yes yes being the stronger of the two, doing mosting of the carting :P ...
observing random kitchen, bedroom, living room furniture... making all those agreeing noises when she goes oooh isn't that cute?? but shud i pick this one or that one?? [ and ur like whatever man...who the heck cares?? they both look stupid. pick something and lets get outta here... ]
basically doing what YOU'RE SUPPOSED to be doing as ur the BF NOT ME!! YES!! i'm tired too!!

and YES it IS exhausting to reconcile 2 young ppl in love who are having a lover's tiff. in FACT i HIGHLY recommend you not to attempt it, and instead go have a daqueri instead

and boys?? u can either sleep in peace or u can have a girlfriend.
girls ALWAYS wanna either talk, or discuss feelings, or discuss where this is going... or discuss they're next home improvement project [ and they DO want your opinion... even if u cudn't care less ]
so you clearly have a choice, its either u get her drunk or you slip some pills into her coffee. that way she falls flat on her face, and you CAN finally sleep in peace! and dude, yes i AM telling you to grow a pair. come ON!! are you a MAN or a MOUSE??? :P
ok i admit, NOW i'm just having fun :P

phew. ok. i showed all proper levels of enthusiasm for all stories. NOW can I go sleep??

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