once in a while. a fire gets lit under my ass and i go off on a tangent... a strange bee under my bonnet as you english speaking ppl say...
so i was searching for it again. the courses on philosophy. i place the blame squarely on someone. 'someone' reminded me of what i originally wanted to do, instead of computers and electronics and all those techie thingies.
i still hate coding. and most of the time i just stare blankly when someone talks about anything more complicated than the abacus and the paper cup dispenser :-/
all i wanted to do, was read books and write theories. so keeping that in mind, all i wanted to do was a doctorate in philosophy. Having established ages ago that i was anyways gonna be a completely worthless zero-productivity for society kind of person, i had decided that atleast i was gonna enjoy my total uselessness.
but 10 yrs later. i'm stuck in front of a giant monitor with a strange aversion to looking at it. [ i prefer to look out the window at the clouds instead ] AND spend my office hours googling various courses offered in various colleges across the country.
well u KNOW its not happening. with my mom hinting of bhook hartals next yr, my relatives staging massive poojas/homas and my last standing defender, the dam - my brother defecting into enemy camp. [ he refuses to staunch the floods anymore ] i think i'm gonna have a tough time convincing them that i need to go to school for 6 more yrs...
if ur interested - u shud look at these programs !
neuroscience and cognitive psychology
philosophy of mind and its various categories
psychology
literature
good lord there's an entire universe out there ! and i'm stuck with this 24 inch screen blasting perl code at me
:-/ ugh i think i'm gonna hurl my lunch.....
oh gr8 my manager wants a project plan... i'll give you a project plan u ****, right where you can put it......
:-/
[ sorry manager. i will now go and do my work like the mindless drone that you pay me to be .. ]
Should I talk to the enemy camp? Just once?
ReplyDeleteno. i like to keep my different psychotic compartments separate. i don't need 2 psycho groups mixing...thank you very much.
ReplyDeletethank you for asking though! < slowly inching away, towards the nearest exit >
nice post. don't worry, this is just a passing phase. u will find your true interest soon.
ReplyDeletei will tell u, going into a new field now is very difficult. we feel as if noting is done htere,but once u take courses, u feel like every thing has been done.
ReplyDeleteI wud give u once suffestion,"stick to something". U have potential to make ur mark in almost anything. But u cant expect results to be there just after u wake up. u have to wait. So, it takes time, to become a good writer, a good programmer almost any thing,
This is my honest advice and i am drunk, so, so can completelly trust me. :"stick to one thing and make ur mark ther:" it can be any thing, ur job, writing, whatever.... stick to it and follow it to the end, this is ur basic problem, u expect resultgs next day, which will never happen, u have to stick to one thing and work ur way uo.
heyy thats gud advice for someone who's drunk...
ReplyDeleteand ummmm thnx?
u r welcome.
ReplyDeleteppl help when we r modest. and to learn the tricks of the trade, u need to be with the gurus.
for ex: not every one is a great programmer, although ppl claim that they can learn java in 2 days, perl in 1 day and others in 1/2 an hour. Those r all bluffers, who don't know what it means to program. also, not every one is great at the art (prog, writin etc), irrespective of whether u r from MIT or CMU or whatever.
There will be one or 2 "code gurus" in every place. They have this "hacker" mentatlity.
We shud learn from them, and to learn from them 'modesty' is the first quality u need to have, coz, as i said, they are hackers. if u understand the hacker mentatlity, u can pretty much win in every thing.