sAy THanK YoU niCeLy

i got all my gifts, b'day gifts through the mail... yaaay !! ^_^
its awesome. overall a good haul this year :P

thnks! R for the CnH book. and thnx K for the Webcam. ooh ooh thnx S&M for the chocolates. they're a big hit all over :)
oh and the THANX GUYS for the ITOUCH >_< thats sooo coool !!! [ woohoo ]
and thnx A for the makeup set [ i get the hint ] and the perfume and the purse and the tote bag....

and thnx Mom for the wierd and hideous earrings < voice trailing off > ummm i mean the wonderful and awesome earrings.

hmmm u know how women turn on the waterworks at the slightest criticism of themselves. no no i'm not saying i'm the exception to that rule. if anything i'd say i was the Queen of that. boy can i NOT take any criticism. ok there's only one criticism i will take and thats of my atrocious spelling. mainly since i make it up as i go along. but other wise.... heyy i already gave you the bad spelling, why do u have to take the rest of it from me as well. [ and by it i mean my i imaginary awesome characteristics like kindness [[ ha! ]], wealth of patience [[ double ha!! ]], maturity [[ oh pleeeease ]] and general awesomeness [[ pls wait while alter ego recovers from hysterical maniacal laughter ]] ]

no but seriously. u really can't tell women that u think they have hideous taste. if u want to tell them, u need to have the diplomatic skills of a UN ambassador between Israel and Palestine [ did i or did i not predict the end of days?? ]. lets come back to the topic. which is the unfortunate plight of hapless guys as they try to tell their female friends/wives/soulmates something the women don't want to hear.

"why are u nodding your head in agreement to what she said? i thought u liked this dress!!"
[ when i 'accidentally' blurted out the dress reminded me of monkeys dancing on a totem pole and the guy was 'accidentally' and frantically nodding his head ]
"DO you or do you NOT like my sense of style?"
[ aaaah brave is the man who can walk into that! ]
"do these jeans make me look fat??"
[ ok here's an imp tip for the right answer. th-e-re IS NO RIGHT ANSWER. quick make a dash for the nearest exit. or you can always pretend a heat attack and have the EMT's take you away ]
"do you like this dress? i LOVE it. do you like it?"
[ just keep nodding ur head men. if YOU think u can be clever and ad lib. your WRONG. ]
idiot moron: "yeah i like it"
"what? L-I-K-E? you don't have to be sarcastic!"
"i wasn't!!!" [ haplessly protesting. conversation rapidly going downhill. guy beginning to develop that tic under his right eye ]
"no i know YOU. u made that face when u said it. why don't you like my dress? tell me why u don't like it. do you think i shud return it and shop for another piece?"
"no no this dress is perfect. its PERFECT. it highlights your best features..." [ he's thinking -> oh GOD another 4 hours of mind numbing shopping? anything but that. wear a potato sack for all i care ]
"thats it. you don't like this dress. i'm exchanging it. come on, lets go to macy's. and this time you have to be there while i try them on. so u can select what you like."
[ i TOLD YOU TO JUST NOD YOUR HEAD AND NOT SAY A WORD you DUMBASS. ]

i know plenty of such golden tips. but then they're another post. some other day. mebe today? who knows!
:P

thnx ma for the earrings. they're perfect! [ which just means that if i crib, then i have to buy my own earrings, and i'm too dumbass lazy to do THAT ]

QoD